The Art of Feeling Your Feelings Without Letting Them Drown You

Dr Arati Bh
Jun 9
3 min read

“Feelings are just visitors. Let them come and go.” – Mooji

We often hear advice like “Just feel your feelings,” or “You need to sit with your emotions.” But what if your feelings feel too big? What if sitting with them makes you feel like you’re drowning?

For many, especially those recovering from trauma, burnout, or emotional overwhelm, feeling your emotions can feel like too much. Too fast. Too soon. This is where emotional work becomes an art—not of avoidance or control, but of learning to be present without being overpowered.

In this blog, we’ll explore what it means to feel your feelings safely and skillfully, so that they become sources of insight—not suffering.

Why We Avoid Our Feelings

Let’s be honest: many of us weren’t taught how to be emotionally present. In childhood, we were often told:

“Don’t cry, be strong.”
“Stop overreacting.”
“You’re too sensitive.”

Over time, we learn to suppress, avoid, or numb our feelings. But suppression is not resolution. What we resist internally doesn’t disappear—it often amplifies, leaks out sideways, or lodges in the body.

When Emotions Flood Us

Sometimes, especially in moments of stress or trigger, emotions can feel like waves crashing down. You may experience:

Tightness in the chest or throat
Racing thoughts or panic
Tearfulness that feels “out of control”
Emotional shutdown or dissociation

These responses are natural. But feeling doesn’t have to equal flooding. The goal isn’t to drown in emotion—it’s to learn to wade in with awareness.

The Art of Feeling: Step by Step

1. Name It to Tame It

Start with emotional labeling. Instead of saying “I’m a mess,” say: “I’m feeling overwhelmed, sad, and tense.”

Naming emotions activates the prefrontal cortex, reducing the intensity of the emotional brain.

2. Anchor in the Body

“Where do I feel this in my body?” “What does it feel like—tight? heavy? hot?”

This shifts the focus from story to sensation. Feeling becomes embodied, not just mental.

3. Set a Safe Container

Time-bound your emotional check-in.Give yourself 10–15 minutes to feel, write, cry, or breathe through the emotion.

Then pause, ground, and return to your day. Emotions don’t need to be solved in one sitting.

4. Use the "Window of Tolerance"

This psychological concept refers to the emotional range in which we can process feelings without shutting down or becoming hyper-aroused.

If an emotion feels too much:

Ground yourself: Touch a cold surface, name 5 things you see
Breathe slowly: Try box breathing (4-in, 4-hold, 4-out, 4-hold)
Use movement: Shake it out, walk, or stretch to release intensity

5. Practice Gentle Curiosity

“What might this emotion be trying to tell me?”
“What need is unmet here?”
“Is this a present feeling or an old wound surfacing?”

Curiosity replaces judgment. It builds emotional intelligence.

Feeling vs. Drowning: Key Differences

Feeling Your Feelings	Drowning in Emotions
Present, grounded awareness	Over-identification with emotion
Emotions are moving through	Emotions feel stuck inside
Observing from a safe distance	Engulfed and overwhelmed
Rooted in self-compassion	Rooted in fear or shame
Allows integration	Creates reactivity or avoidance

Tools to Support Emotional Flow

Journaling: Stream-of-consciousness writing for 10 minutes
Voice Notes: Speak your truth privately, uncensored
Art Therapy: Express emotions through color, shape, or collage
Somatic Practices: Grounding, shaking, or tapping (EFT)
Guided Meditation: Body scan or loving-kindness practices

Important: Safety First

If your emotions feel too overwhelming, or if you notice intense flashbacks, panic, or shutdown—stop and ground yourself. This may be a sign of stored trauma needing deeper support.

You don’t have to do this alone.

You are not your emotions. You are the space in which they rise and fall. The art of feeling isn’t about becoming fearless—it’s about becoming friendly with your inner world.

At SereinMind, I work with clients to develop emotional safety, literacy, and resilience. Together, we learn to walk through the storm without getting lost in it. Dr. Arati Bhatt – SereinMind